I had some sad news last week as I learned of my grandmother’s passing. She was 93 and lived a long, full life. She passed as we all hope to – with her physically body slowly shutting down and gently drifting away.
Even though I understood that it was her time and am grateful that she didn’t suffer I still found myself deeply affected by it all. She was the only grandparent that I really knew and loved and supported me unconditionally. She was also the female elder, matriarch of the Wells line, the blood of my blood and I FELT it.
As the news sunk in, I spent the better part of the weekend reminiscing amongst random bouts of tears, eating junk food (chips, chocolate, gummy candies) gluten and other foods that are known allergies to me, not to mention an entire bottle of wine to myself (yes, in one sitting). Essentially, I tried to bury the feelings that tried to surface and the loneliness I felt at her passing. I was consciously doing this too, knowing that there would be push back at some point, but called to allow myself the space to do as I needed in those moments.
Sunday night and all of Monday the reality of my choices hit hard physically. My tummy was in knots with serious digestive distress, my mind foggy and my body lethargic and achy. Returning to work on Monday was a challenge, but a welcome distraction. On my afternoon break, I took a walk and had a chat with my body and recognized that I really don’t like the way I feel when I indulge like that, my body in obvious agreement by showing me quickly in many ways that we are past that. We FEEL our feelings, we don’t FEED them.
This was not always the case, as I had eating disorder in my teenage years, but it is something that has been in my past for a long time. The lifestyle approach that I preach to others, is something that I also practice and have for many years. Except apparently on occasions (oh Mercury retrograde!) such as these.
It’s now Friday and I still have random tears that flow, but I am happy to report my brain feels clear again and my digestion back to normal. As much as I made conscious choices to eat and drink whatever I wanted last weekend, I also made conscious choices this week to return to some state of balance. Below are a few of the things that work for me, if you find yourself at the bottom of a slippery slope, try one (or all) and begin the climb back up. The sooner you can course correct (and still feel what you need to feel) the more your body will thank you.
How do we course correct?
- Forgive yourself. This is huge. We all slip up in some way, don’t double the effects by berating yourself with guilt and shame. There is enough of that in the world already. Show up for you and be as kind as you would to a friend in crisis.
- Aim to make improvements. I haven’t eaten perfectly this week, but I did eat less junk driven by how I FEEL. I also had a few glasses of wine, allowing myself space to do so, again being tender with myself. The grief is real no matter what the cause may be.
- Seek the help of others. I am fortunate to have an amazing team of practitioners that help me through tough times. I had a visit with my chiro and an extra session with my acupuncturist. They both offer approaches and treatments that deal with the body and emotions as one and are amazing compassionate healers. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Friends are good too but be ok with seeking help even if you need to pay for it. These professionals are trained to help the body and mind when trauma strikes. A massage, a therapist—whatever works for you. Help your body feel what you need to and move it.
- Move your body. You knew this was coming. I wasn’t feeling the usual intensity of my workouts and knew I wasn’t fueled as well as I could be nutritionally speaking so I backed off. In these times, choose stretching, walking, breathing. Ease. But keep moving. Try not to stop altogether and seek the outdoors when possible. There is much healing in the forests and water. Mother Earth takes care of her children.
Do you have any tips that you want to share that get you through the rough times? If so, please do!